There are probably some reasons that stand in the way of being forgiving. It may seem strange but people can be very reluctant to let go of their disappointment or anger at someone else for something they’ve done. Maybe it’s easier to keep the victim mentality than to embrace forgiveness. Maybe we want some kind of justice to be satisfied and we think we can do that by withholding forgiveness.
Maybe something deep inside us wants the other person to suffer as we have. Unfortunately, it’s usually the person that hangs on to feelings of unforgiving that ends up suffering the most. Perhaps viewing the offender from a different point of view would pave the way to forgiveness. Perhaps they weren’t malevolent after all but merely confused or misled. Either way, forgiveness means we are ready to move on. It doesn’t mean that what happened was okay or that it’s an excuse for someone else’s bad behavior; it simply means we no longer want to be crushed under the burden. We want to become free.
Forgiving others brings us great benefits
- Helps to break the negative cycle
- Helps us to grow more compassion. This brings joy.
- It’s healthy to let go of anger. Feelings of anger, revenge and other punitive emotions only serves to keep us shrouded in negativity. To break free of the anger is real freedom.
- It allows our time and energy to be spent on something of greater value. Self-improvement, making happy memories, spending time with the ones we love.
- Peace of mind. We can finally put the past behind us where it belongs and concentrate on being the best we can be in the present and the future. Forgiveness is the keep to moving on. It sets us free.
You can forgive someone silently or in person. Although most people don’t want to confront the person they are forgiving, for many reasons, it’s still a very liberating feeling. Or even sending a note can bring a sweet feeling of having forgiven someone.
Forgiveness works in all situations. Whether the event was large or small, forgiveness can heal the pain. On a daily basis, family members may have misunderstandings or say unkind things. Forgiving on a daily basis means you can go to bed at night with a clear head and have a better sleep.
Family caregivers are very busy people and it’s very important for you to have time for personal care. You need time to go out with your friends, take care of your job and family, and have down-time to rest and relax. If you need help, arrange for a home care provider for your elderly loved one.